Four Patterns That Destroy Onesness

• Occurs when one partner consistently believes that the motives of the other are more negative than is really the case. (Mind Reading)

• Occurs when you assume you know what your partner is thinking or why he or she did something.

• When your mind reading includes negative judgment about the thoughts and motives of your spouse, you may be in real trouble, both in your marriage and spiritual life.

• Withdrawal

· An unwillingness to get into or stay with important discussions.

· Leaving the room

· Subtle as ‘turning off’ or ‘shutting down’.

• Avoidance

· Reluctance to get into certain discussions.

· Emphasis on the attempt to not let the conversation happen in the
first place.

Example: Like a Dance

· Pursuer - the one who brings issues up for discussion, or calls attention to the need to make a decision.

· Withdrawer - the person who tends to avoid these discussions or pulls away during them.

Why do men withdraw?
Because it does not feel safe to stay in the argument.
It’s not emotionally safe.

For more information we recommend:

1. Sign up for one of our R&R Rebuild & Restore your Marriage Seminars.

- Click here to find a class in your area

2. Purchase the book "A Lasting Promise" by Scott Stanley